Wednesday, May 21, 2008
I was talking to a co-worker the other day. He asked how things were going with Chico’s preschool, and we chatted for a bit. I guess I should mention that his son, who is now 21, has OCD, among other things. So anyway, we are talking about the public school system and the navigation of special services,etc., and he said something I found a little odd. He said “You know, I’ve found that if you just cut your expectations in half, you’ll be a lot happier. Expect the negative, and the disappointments, and the failures. Then when things go right for a change, you’ll be happy.” Now granted, his son’s 21 and mine’s 5. Maybe it’s his years of experience that have sort of worn him down to that point. But I cannot, and will not lower my expectations for Chico. To do so, to me would mean giving up. That’s what it sounded like he was saying. Like he’d given up on his son. And it made me so sad. I have great expectations for my son, whatever his abilities turn out to be. I just wonder if his son knew his Dad had given up, and so maybe the son’s given up as well. I really believe that what you expect will come to you. Maybe I should have said that to him. I didn’t though. I just changed the subject to a project that we were working on. And I walked away as quickly as I could, reminding myself that this is why I never try to give people advice.