Inspired by the
discussion started by the ever-lovely Heather of
Oh My Stinkin' Heck, I'm thinking today about the reasons why homeschooling became the best choice for our family.
Now, I don't believe that homeschool is the only valid option for education. I don't even believe that homeschool is the best choice for every family. For ours, it is not only the best option, but became our only option after the disastrous year that Chico spent in public school.
We homeschool because
Chico learns best in a 1:1 teaching environment. Since C is my only child, I have the luxury of tailoring each and every school day to what works for us at the time. For example, we've been using the same basic visual schedule and subject order since we started homeschooling. A month ago, math had become a sticking point, and was often the catalyst for a meltdown. I decided to try moving math from it's place as the third item on our schedule to the very first spot, employing the "
Eat That Frog!" principle. So far, it's worked. Chico gets his math done when his energy and patience stores (mine as well, truth be told) are at their highest. The rest of the schedule looks easier because our most difficult task is done first. In a classroom full of children, such a change would likely be impossible.
Chico's skills are uneven. Like many autistic individuals, Chico shows amazing strengths in some areas, and deficiencies that would put him into the 'impaired' category in others. Homeschool allows us the opportunity to reframe his work to not only take advantage of his strengths and allow him the sweet taste of success, but also to reinforce those weaker skills and allow him to strengthen them. In theory a public school IEP is supposed to accomplish the same end, but our experience was that C's work was being completed 'for' him rather than being tailored to him.
Our school day is dedicated to his success. As the parent of a special needs child, your chief objective is getting your child's needs met. You cannot be concerned with any other child in the class. If there is ever a conflict, then the choice has to be your child's benefit, even up to and including pulling resources from someone else. That's just the way it is. There are only so many hours, providers, and money to go around, and there is no room for sympathy in the world of special education. In our 'class', all resources, time, and money are dedicated to Chico. There is no competition, no time when he is pushed aside, no busy-work to keep him occupied while I work with someone else. It's all for and about him.
The 'sit still and work' part of our day is short. We do have 'desk work'. There's no getting around it, and I do think that concentration and attention to task are valuable skills. However, for us this amounts to about 1 - 1.5 hours total; the rest of the time Chico can move if he needs to. In fact, we regularly go out to walk the dog as the wrap up to our school day, and reinforce what we've worked on along the way. I believe that the combination of the physical activity and discussion really helps to cement concepts for C.
Chico takes a while to learn new skills. Probably longer than most NT children. He does get it eventually though, and that's okay. I'm glad that we can give him the time and repetition he needs to get things. Mastery is more important to me than speed, and it's equally important to me to make sure that C doesn't always feel that he's failing. I believe strongly in setting children up for success, not by making work falsely easy, but by allowing adequate time for practice before evaluation. In a setting that's set up for a strict time and testing schedule, that doesn't happen.
We tried public school, and it failed us. We gave public school a try. They responded to C's needs by warehousing him, and eventually by isolating him for large parts of the day. Chico ended his public school career with the exact same skills he began with, and with fears he never had before attending. I still don't believe that public school is inherently wrong. Some children do well there. Ours didn't though, and I'm glad I recognized that and pulled him out before any more damage was done.
I get to be there to encourage him when he's struggling, and to witness the moments when a concept just 'clicks'. And really, that for me is worth all of the work.